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Saturday, October 20, 2012

Its Arnold Schwarzenegger's birthday! "Batman and Robin" Review.

“Batman & Robin” aka “The movie that brought nipples to the Batsuit” is commonly named as the worst movie of all time when the subject comes up (Of course the people who say that obviously haven’t seen Troll 2). Those claims are not without basis though; this film is actually pretty dire but it’s also interesting in a ridiculous kind of way.

George Clooney takes over as batman with about as much suitability for the role as Jackie Chan would have if he played Bill Clinton. Arnold Schwarzenegger is Mr. Freeze and he only talks in puns “Let’s kick some ice!” “Allow me to break the ice” etc which makes me want to do this entire review in Mr. Freeze puns as well.

I’m not going to describe the plot to you because to be honest nothing about it is worth telling, other than the fact that at some point during the film we get to see nipples on Batman’s suit. Perhaps the nipples were already there in the other movies but we never got to see them because it wasn’t cold enough, but have Mr. Freeze show up thought and -Tada! - Nipples.

Icy what director Joel Schumacher was trying to do with the movie though; he wanted it to be a bit more faithful to the old TV series that was as ridiculous as this movie was. And you really can’t blame the guy because you can tell he really is trying to make a good movie instead of make money, the movie he is trying to make is crap but at least his intentions are good. I mean some people call him an ice hole because he ruined a franchise. I actually am somewhat grateful that this movie exists because without it the Nolan Batman’s wouldn’t have been necessary.

If you are one of the people that think that he had snow business directing movies you should give him some slack because he even apologized. I suppose though that everyone was looking for someone to blame for the bad quality of the film and once one person had the guts to point his finger at Joel, then the rest snowballed down.

If you think I am defending the film then chill out! I am not suggesting that it isn’t as bad as people make it out to be. Of course I think the movie is rubbish but when there are movies out there like “Troll 2” or “Manos: The Hands of Fate” you have to appreciate that it is more of a bad drawing your son made rather than a complete mess.


How many Mr. Freeze puns can you count in the review? Post a comment below giving me the answer. Don’t just give a number, quote the pun directly because next week I’m gonna highlight them and if you get them all you will win a chance to guest post on my blog.

P.S Today is my 21st birthday and I had my first legal beer in the US. It turns out I’m a Blue Moon guy. What beer do you guys like?